Wednesday, November 21, 2007

I blew it

I just found out today by looking at other bloggers that there was a 31 for 21 campaign for Down Sydrome Awareness. That is what I get for not exploring around on different blogs. The last couple of days I have tried to skip around and see what else is going on. A lot of very interesting blogs, I just don't know where I would get the time to actually try to follow any of these.

I do want to go back to some of the DS blogs and read what was written back in October. I am not sure what I would have written about for 31 days in a row. It is sad, but I can't really remember if I went through and devoted an entry for each of my kids and one for my wife either. I know I introduced them a some point though, I guess.

What to say about Thomas. Whenever I am asked how he is doing by my parents in NE or friends at work, I am always kind of caught at not really knowing how or what to say. It is tough to sometimes put into words what Thomas is all about. There are plenty of moments where he will simply drive you crazy and these moments usually occur each and every day. He most times has to be carried into the bathroom to do #1 and #2 only happens in his pullup or worse his underwear. He has a real problem with sharing his toys with his sisters. He can be stubborn and loud. BUT those are just the not so good things. It is funny in the mornings to have him and Angie(2 & 1/2years old) sitting at our table eating breakfast. They will talk back and forth at each other like an old married couple--one will say something and the other will respond but it won't really be about what the other said and eventually one will get loud and the other will say "not so loud". It cracks me up still that Angie calls Thomas "Pap". We don't know why and she probably doesn't know either, but Thomas does respond to her when she calls him this. Thomas loves dancing and watching TV and doing both is great. He loves to laugh and loves to make people laugh also. All of his teachers and helpers say how they just love Thomas because he is funny and great to work with, even though I am sure they see plenty of his bad days as well. Thomas just brings joy to most everyone he is around and I think it is from his generally happy attitude. He loves me reading to him every night and I love how no matter how many books I read as soon as I start reading to him for The Lives of the Saints he falls asleep. Thomas is just a really interesting child, he certainly sees things in a different light than most people as well. He is also very perceptive if people are having bad days and will usually ask you what's the matter. He is also very good at asking questions and changing the subject when he is in trouble--the little stinker. He also likes to push me & mom together so we hug with him in the middle and also starts group hugs as well. I am also kind of stuck with the fact that a lot of how I feel about Thomas is just that a wonderful feeling and I have a hard time expressing that in words. I think part of it is that the little things about Thomas really do matter and how to you explain that to people in general. Little things like the funny way he dances or the goofy voices he will make or the little quirks about the foods he likes or the funny(at least to me & him) games & noises we make at stores and many many other things like this.

I know some of the blogs I read today were questioning if there were any parents out there that are not having a good time parenting a child with DS and/or questioning why they were given their child with DS. I think most parents ask these same types of questions, how can they not. There is a lot of stress in raising a special needs child. Thomas is 6 and I already am worried about what his future is going to be like through school and then after high school and beyond. Just thinking about those things kind of scare me. I also am just waiting for potty training to make some more progress. He has started wearing underwear to school and rarely has an accident there, at home not the same at all. I know of other local parents with a child with DS that are now divorced, I don't know if the stress got to their marriage or if it was something else. I don't see myself and my wife ever getting a divorce, but I would guess there are plenty of other couples that thought the same thing that ended there. One thought that has kind of remained with me since Thomas was born, is that how lucky both we are and he was that we live in the US. I think of us having Thomas as citizens of another country where we/he would not have even close to the same opportunities, the same medical care, the same education and so on. I also think about other countries where if found out prenatally abortion would be that much more likely, China always comes to mind for me, but I actually don't know if this would be the case or not.

I kind of wish I had known about that 31 for 21 campaign but then again I struggle to find time to just type something every week or so here. One of the many things kind of floating around in my mind is that I should try to be more active at this whole blogging thing. Both in doing it daily or every other day as well as actually finding and reading some of those interesting blogs that are out there. Right now it is just a thought, it will probably be a few weeks(months?) before I actually start doing it--that is usually the way it works for me it seems.

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